| Last week of college.
Pretty unreal. Def. hasn't hit me yet.
I have nothing to do all week, but wait
to take my plants and civilization final thursday
morning. stupid.
hanging out at work for a while and just
killing time before graduation. selling a lot
of my furniture in the house to get some
money together for the summer. so weird
that this chapter of my life is almost at a
end.
Here's my Senior College Pictures. :)
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| BAH. I can't believe I am graduating college.
after 5 fucking awful years of engineering coursework.
I finally finally am this close to making it. It's unreal
to me right now that after, I even have a job ha.
college has been such an amazing experience with
myself. just in the fact that I have finally grown into
myself and my personality and just have figured out
what finally makes me happy.
after high school, i was shy and confused, and didn't
know my potential. now after enduring a painful amount
of coursework with engineering... i am finally here.
anyways.
I'm back down to 114.5 which made me stoked this
morning. just trying to get back to bikini ready :)
before I leave for Wisconsin.. I wanna be at my best.
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| uh this week is bad.
so much to get done before
friday for my senior presentations in
front of the whole school. our project
isn't close to even being done because
we still haven't received certain parts.
still have so much to do, got up early
to get some stuff together and running.
so hopefully that helps. at I'm at least
decently productive.
eating like shit. i feel so fat right now.
fuck me. |
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| I'm getting lazier and lazier.
knowing that I have a real job
after college, is like finding out
which college you are going to in
high school.
i have a test today, but it's open note
and open book, therefore I put maybe
3 hours of studying into it. lol pathetic.
hopefully it goes well.
ankle still hurts, it's rather annoying.
sean and i had a long convo, crying convo,
about what was going on with us, it was
nice to let some stuff out and figure out
how we can save it before I leave in July.
april is going to be busy busy. so much to
get done ahead of time. like writing papers ha
its just so weird to see the light at the
end of the tunnel, i never thought i would be
almost done with college
back sophomore year, that's me jumping off onto a huge slip n slide.
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| idk what to do.
i've been with this kid for almost 3 years.
and we are at the cross roads. and im really.
sadly. honestly. just not feeling it anymore.
i want to get it back and get back to where
we were but i dont know why i feel like this
all of a sudden.
he's being so selfish and i dont know why
he's pullish this bullshit card on me right now.
i deserve better obviously but i used to be all
about him. how can i just flip in a heart beat.
idk what to do my mind is spinning with it.
so much of me wants to just let go and be single.
but i know i can't do that when we are both in the
same place. i know that i have to be gone aka. on
my job in wisconsin this summer to do it.
am i feeling this way because he's not putting 100%
into it? idk
god i am a mess.
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